Case Studies

I had cheated on my husband with his best friend – Billy. My husband Ray had found more and more reasons to be with his beer than to be with me. When he came home drunk – night after night – it became too much for me to bear, with the house and kids to take care of and his constant putting me down. So when Billy started to show me the faintest hint of attention, I was drawn to him like the moth to the flame. Billy would make sure Ray was completed wasted and then leave him at the bar to steal away with me. I felt so loved and needed in Billy's strong arms but I was living a lie. Oh sure it was easy to “justify” what I was doing because Ray wasn't there for me anyway. But the guilt just kept building and building until I finally started becoming physically ill and depressed. I could not go on this way much longer or I was going to have a nervous breakdown.

Ray started to make accusations about my fidelity and followed that up with violent outbursts, first the verbal and mental abuse and then finally the physical blows. Even though I know it was wrong to allow myself to be treated that way, I somehow felt I deserved what was coming because of the shameful way I had cast away our wedding vows and lusted after Billy. Ray put me in the hospital one time too many and I finally realized that if I did not do something soon, I was going to leave my children without a mother. Instead of visiting me at home, they would be visiting my grave site. I needed to find a way to heal.